Ordinariate Etiquette

    Two or three times a year, I like to use this column as a vehicle for ‘Housekeeping” issues. These are mundane issues in some ways, but important for us to pay attention to.  I like to refer to these as some “Ordinariate Etiquette” examples for us to implement. Each of these has been brought to my attention  (since my last article about this) in one way or another, and I thought this letter  on the last Sunday of Epiphany would be the most appropriate way to address all them before we move into the busy liturgical seasons of Lent and Easter.
 
1. While the Catholic Church of St. Mary the Virgin does not have a “dress code” per se, and we are not  going to post diagrams of cartoon figures showing our parishioners how to dress for church, we do feel that we should all be in our Sunday best for the Masses on Sunday, (it helps to imagine how you would dress if invited to a banquet given by a celebrity, or high government official, and recall that the Sunday Mass is a banquet far more important than any earthly one, and that Christ Himself is the host). 
Men should always shave before approaching the altar at any time. One wouldn’t appear before a trial judge, or even a performance review board at work, without taking this basic step, and every time we approach the altar, we approach the One who will return to judge the world.
2. Communion is received on the tongue in the Ordinariate , and kneeling whenever possible. This practice shows the greatest reverence before God, and consideration for our fellow parishioners. 
3. It is frustrating for our handicapped parishioners and guests to find all the reserved spaces occupied by cars without the special handicap decal or license plate. Parking can be a challenge,  the Parish Council is exploring all options, but unless your car has a handicap decal or license, please do not occupy these spaces. Speaking of parking, we have a sign up sheet in the parish hall for volunteers to don the bright yellow vests, and, equipped with our stop signs, to direct traffic in and out of our parking lot between  the 8Am and 10:30am Masses. This is a good example of a seemingly mundane issue which would become critical (in every sense) were an accident to occur on our campus. Please, if you are able, sign up to participate in this quiet, but essential, ministry.
4. Now that our new playground has been finished,  parents, please do not let your children climb on the trees next to the parish hall. It can very damaging to the trees themselves, and, more importantly, we don’t want any of our little ones to be hurt by falling out of a tree and landing on the concrete! Please encourage your children to play in in the playground area itself,  and please designate one adult in your family to accompany your children there.
5. This leads me to asking everyone to please accompany your children when they need to use the restroom. Since there are no bathrooms in the church itself, it is very prudent (and  a part of our Child Safety Guidelines) that our children not be wandering alone in the parish hall and parking lot. 
6. Mass can seem long! Although we do work hard to keep our celebrations, (and our homilies!), interesting and engaging. If one’s mood wanders, though, (or one's child does) please do not  succumb to the temptation to draw on, or pick at the upholstery or the pews. The bell at the Sanctus, or at the Consecration Prayer itself, will help (re)focus everyone’s attention towards the Altar.
7. Crying babies are welcome!  Repeat: Crying Babies Are Welcome! ( The old phrase: “A church that’s not crying is a church that’s dying” is a truth, and we love the “joyful noise unto the Lord” by our youngest members). But children running in the church can be a distraction to both the Altar Party, and one’s pew neighbors. Children who are especially rambunctious during Mass are encouraged to be taken into the Narthex at the back of the church, (speakers are mounted on the walls in that area) where there are some children’s books to use if needed, or outside until they feel calmer. Similarly if a baby or child is unable to calm down, and who continues crying for a significant amount of time, is also requested be taken to the Narthex or Patio/Parish until the child feels calmer. The tower bell will alert all those who are out in the patio with energetic youngster that it’s time  to return to Mass. While breastfeeding is a normal and natural part of life, and our moms are encouraged to do this in the pews, it can perhaps become a distraction to others at the rail, or our altar servers assisting with communion, to continue nursing at this time. We rely on the common sense of our nursing moms to assist with this request.
8. It is permitted to serve snacks to toddlers in the pews at mass, but it is a great help that if one does, one also looks around their pew (and the floor) and collect cereal, cookie crumbs etc. as a gesture to the next family who will be using that pew.
9. Veils are encouraged for women (although not required). Extra  (cleaned or new) veils can be found in the Narthex. Donations of new or cleaned veils are welcome, please place them in the container in the Narthex.
10. And finally; Please (PLEASE!) put one’s cell phone on “silent mode” before entering the church, or better yet, turn it off, or leave it in the glove compartment of the car 
    I am sure that there are other “Ordinariate Etiquette” practices we can follow but for now, let us resolve to honor God when in His habitation here on earth, and practice these thoughtful courtesies for, and with, each other.
 
Faithfully, Your Friend and Pastor,
 
Fr. Christopher C. Stainbrook